Mindlessness

There are many ways to 'commit suicide'. When the pain of life becomes unbearable many people choose to end their lives, or some become vagrants or vagabonds, or maybe they retreat into a monastery or ashram. At times a weary soul needs to step out of reality and become mindless.

Mindlessness is a beautiful state where you forget what day it is, you don't have any concept of what is going on in the media, no endless list of emails to go through, no traffic to contend with, no intellectual challenges, no idea of what is going wrong in your bank account, no shopping to do, no mobile phones, and no relationship ‪issues to have to manage. Your mind is consumed by the absolute basics of life: the next meal, toilet needs, basic hygiene, core chores, and staying safe, warm and dry. Raw survival. That is what many people crave when they don't have it in them any longer to cope with their lives and decide to end it.

Mindlessness provides space for nothingness - an opportunity to grieve, regroup, rethink, redefine, gather yourself or simply just be. A moment in time to create an emptiness where you can walk through the bare rooms of your vulnerability, draw the curtains, let the sun in and enjoy the warmth of the light. Minimalism provides room for a spiritual connection to your very being and helps you face the pains and sorrows in a much more comfortable way.

This is what this race is to me - a year to stop my crazy world, get off, go around it, and then I might have the courage to get on it again. All I need to worry about is how to tie a knot, coil a sheet, getting up and dressed on time for my watch at 3am, making sure the spinnaker sail doesn't collapse, cooking for twenty every ten days, and ignoring the people who might have the ability to upset me. Apart from these types of very mindless basics I find peace in the big blue noise of the waves, the light playing catchup with the water, watching the birds fly for hours on end, and sharing jokes and chatting about trivialities to my crew mates. Nothing is really important nor stressful. There is quiet and calm, even in the middle of the most ferocious storm.

This race is my year to take breaths as deep as the oceans I sail, fill my soul with crystal clear air, and know that I will be happier and more alive than I've ever been. I can leave bits of my pain in the wake of the boat and give up everything that ever attached me to any broken dreams. Detachment frees an exhausted spirit.

Every person owes it to themselves to find their mindlessness. This doesn't look like anything specific - it could be the simplest of actions or inaction - going for a walk, doing a yoga class, just sitting in your favourite spot for hours, or taking a road trip. Just being in whatever way you want to be. Creating a state of nothingness and space is the best way to 'commit suicide'. Nothing else matters and you ironically really start living.